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It was difficult to realize the time inside the dark hood. Radio sounds and musical songs helped a little in it.
Sometimes it even felt like I fell asleep for a moment. I was happy that the hood was lightweight material, easy to breathe through.
In the end, I woke and heard the sound of the door lock.

I heard when they entered the room. One of them sat on my bed next to my head.
I knew it was Ilona because I heard a gentle sound that comes from her leather pants inside the lining. It's a great sound.
She was so close that her thigh was against my head. I tried  smell the leather scent.
A "normal" person would be terrified in this situation but what do I do? ... I try to sniff my tormentors leather! I was disappointed when I couldn't find a scent.
Ilona's hand was on my head. She pressed my face against her thigh. She clearly knew what I was thinking and teasing me more.

"We have discussed what happened" She said calmly "We didn't reach all the members of the Committee. That is why the final decision has been shifted to the future ".
"However, we have to leave here and go back to the south" she told me "but first you have to eat something".

She took hood off my head. It was nice to see something again. She was holding a plate with food. It seemed to be a dose of lasagne.
She nodded with a man who opened my gag strap,  before the ball was taken out of my mouth she took hand paper and made sure my saliva did not lie down on the bed nor on my clothes. She wiped my corners of the mouth and jaw.
"Thanks," I said, it was nice while she took care of me accurately.
"Ok, now eat your food," she took a piece of lasagna with a fork and brought it close to my mouth. I was surprised. I thought they would open my handcuffs etc and I could eat myself next to the table.
"Can't I eat like normal?" I cried "I don't want to be fed like an animal!"
"I also want to go to the bathroom" I said resolutely "I want the diaper out!

Ilona slap my face ... with an open palm. Hit was not hard but it shocked me. She has never hit me before. The slap wasn't tough , it just surprised me.
"Listen now!" She said very firmly, "Because your violent behavior is still in progress, you will be treated accordingly". She looked at me seriously, "You can still influence how this goes. If you behave well then this is much easier for you!"
"The animals eat from the floor, I try to feed you like a human ... what do you want?" She said angry "I can also put the dish on the floor and you can try eat there!"

Surprising things like slap to face and anger got me completely locked. I was in shock.
She saw me crying. "Ok Princess, pull yourself together! Sometimes life is hard," she said cruelly.

"Unlock chain from bed" Ilona said to the man "The princess must get to the bathroom now".
The man removed the chain and was going to help me stand up.
"No!" she said "stay on your knees. Use them and go to the bathroom".
I was so upset that I couldn't even cry any more.
I fought myself up and went out of the room. I heard how my legcuffs and chain dragged against the floor.  Slowly, I finally got to the bathroom. My knees were like fire. There was a big pain in my hands behind my back. On the way I watered more on my diaper.

"I don't want ..." I tried to say but Ilona stopped me.
"Quiet now, your right to speak has been denied now," she said.
She went to the shower place, I saw that she still had my food plate in her hand.
If you want to know how the animals eat ..." she moved the lasagne from the plate straight to the floor "you can try it here and now!"
"No ..." I tried to refuse, but she stopped me again.
"You have to behave now" she said with great patience "You eat your food, then we take out the diaper, wash you and prepare you for the trip. Simply, right?"

Ilona tied my hair behind my head. I had no options. I tried to lean down but I didn't reach for food. My corset and back chain between the collar and waistchain prevented it.
"Oh, c'moon! Help her on the floor," Ilona said to the man and he helped me on my stomach floor, Lasagne was in front of my face.
"Quickly now, princess, eat your food," she order "at the same time you can think about which animal you are."
Lasagne was already cold, it had been for a long time. But it was soft and easy to eat. I could only imagine what I look like, lasagna has meat, cheese and tomato sauce and other ingredients that spread around my face.
Fortunately, the dose was not big and I ate it completely.
She poured some water on the floor and said, "lick the water and clean the floor. There's still tomato."
The floor was smooth and clean material, it certainly washed every day. Yet this all disgusts me. This is very inhumane and humiliating. But still I did it.

"Help her up," Ilona said and the man did so.
I looked at myself in the mirror. I was horribly looking!
My face and chest were full of lasagna, red-brown and messy.
New fine sweater was completely ruined!
Tears fell on my cheeks, making grooves in my brown red cheeks.
Diaper was swollen because more urine had come, Tapes were tight.

"Well..." Ilona was next to me and watched me "What animal?"
Although I felt very humiliated I laughed "absolutely some kind of lizard!"
She looked at me surprised, "I thought same!"
"There are a lot of things in lizards and you now. You eat in the ground on your stomach, you eat messy, you are stubborn and offensive ... And like you, the lizard can also live in captivity in a closed space for long time".
"Can I say something?" I asked
She nodded.
"Please, do not call me a princess," I said, "It is not fair to real princess'
"What are you then, how you need to be named? " she asked.
"I am a prisoner, Its my status ,I'm used to it"

to be continued...

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The corset felt very tight and uncomfortable. I was already used to being looser.
It was deliberately loose only during the visit to make me more comfortable, I thought ... now we're back to normal.
Rubber pants were uncomfortable. When I was standing, they were basically tolerable, but sitting in them was difficult.
When my waistchain was tightened, the vertical chain behind the back between the collar and waitchain seems to be shorter. It forces me upright.
It is fascinating how quickly a human mind adapts to change. I had a little looser time for a moment, a few hours, and I immediately got it. Now the return to normal seems difficult.
I was happy that I got my normal handcuffs. There is a chain link between them so I can move my wrists.
Rigid handcuffs are very effective, their use is very restrictive, especially behind the back. They are also awkward in front.
I was happy that the handcuffs were not now locked in the waist. I knew that it was happening inside the car.
I looked at my mittens, they were tightly tied again. they tightened my fingers tightly into the fist. It was frustrating.
I was thinking about the gloves I had before. They were beautiful, looked "normal" and feminine outward.
Strict mittens are more practical than beautiful gloves, I understand it.

When I sat, I felt my buttplug. Or actually I feel the hose that was connected to it. It also came out of my pants on the right side of the waist. The hand pump was somewhere outside.
Egg inside my vagina I didn't even notice.
Believe me, I know how much stuff you can put inside a person .I've seen it. People can smuggle incredible quantities of goods inside the body.

The door opened and they entered the room.
"Are you ready to go?" Ilona asked.
It was a funny question .. what could I have answered? I sat there like a dog waiting.
Man unlock my chain and took it in his hand. Ilona helped me stand. I already had a stiff feeling, I wonder what it is after many hours of driving?

I walked like Daisy Duck between them towards the car that was in front of the door.

to be continued...

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We drove out of the area, We came to the village center and I saw the house again where grandma lives. We drove silently past it and I knew that I would never come back here again.
Ilona saw that I had difficulties to control myself, my tears flowed down my cheeks. She left me with my own thoughts for a moment, we were all quiet.

We had been driving for a while when we turned to a bigger road, towards the south and to Helsinki.
I was still sad and in my own thoughts.

Ilona turned to me and search electric wires to my waist, a jacket and a shirt underneath.
It was well planned that all the wires and also hand pump hose came out of the rubber trousers on the right side of my waist. They were now directly accessible to her.
"How are you?" she looked at me with concern.
I still had tears in her eyes but I chuckled lightly, "I am alive, I know it because I feel the pain and discomfort everywhere."
"It's good that you feel alive," she said with a thought "It is not worth giving too much power to sorrow, its time is later".
She had a device in her hand, I knew what it was ... It is a controller for an electric shock device. She searched for four thin electrical wires on my waist and connected them to the controller.
I was very tense, I was waiting for feeling electrical pulses, but nothing happened. She lowered the control to the seat.
She took my buttplug hand pump in her hand, she looked into it and said, "I'm not really sure about this. As you may have noticed, the hose between the plug and the pump is longer than normal, it is also a stronger material. That's why so because the hose makes a long distance for you inside the tight rubber pants. Normal thin tube can shrink under pressure and may not work well ".
I felt this thicker hose every moment under my pants, it weighed my skin. I had already wondered about that strange feeling. Now I know it.
"Functionality can only be tested in one way now" I said quietly.
Ilona smiled at me "It's nice you're always so curious and experimental!"
She pressed the hand pump twice lightly. I immediately felt something in my rectum. Nothing shocking, but now I know it works.
"It works fine..." I said quietly
Ilona took the last item from my waist. It was a vaginal egg controller. She put the power on and the egg exploded inside me! It shivered and shook vigorously, I got scared of its abruptness. I scream for the surprise.
"hmmm, ok. Maybe I have to learn to adjust this ..." Ilona said with a smile. She snap power off.

She looked at me with a smile, "We have planned a travel game for you. Because we have many hundred kilometers of driving distance, the game goes like this: The driver measures the distance. I put power on your equipment, every 20 km I increase the volume, etc. It increases or changes every time. After 100 km there is a short break and then everything starts again. Doesn't it sound funny? ”
It sounded different. I was tense in a special way, maybe also anxious about the idea.
They always manage to develop different things. It's a nice variation in my dull everyday life even though it's sometimes hard

I looked Ilonaa serious, "I know why you are doing this."
"We do what?" she asked with astonishment.
"This is all ... an accusation of bad behavior, violence etc. It gives you a reason to humiliate me in many ways and make my life unpleasant. Hard and harsh handling and now this ... extreme trip back home "I looked at her serious" You do it because I could think of something other than grandma's illness and future death....You give me a lot of thought and experience so I can overcome the shocking visit with grandma."
Ilona looked at me and listened quietly. When I was finished she said "Well ... that was an interesting theory!"
She turned to the driver and said "tell me when we can start first 100 km session!"

to be continued...

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Ilona increased the vibration of the egg strength,
I noticed the change and I overdo it again.
She also increased the intensity of electrical impulses in my buttocks. It gave the feeling that the plug would move back and forth in response to each pulse. It was a strange feeling. Otherwise, she let everything be unchanged.
We were quiet for a long time.
Finally, I asked, "Will the Committee now have a new member in your place?"
Ilona was now much calmer "There will be no new member in the committee, I will stay there as before" she looked at me, "Nothing will change, I'm still involved in all matters that concern you".
She looked at me "... and no, my family will not go with me to Germany, they will stay here".
I felt to be sad, it is unfortunate that people face divorce and move away. I would not have wanted that for her it happens. I didn't know what to say ... and if I said something she could get nervous again. I was uncertain.
Ilona saw my look, she saw that I am sad. Then she smiled at me.
"You don't have to be sad about my life, there is no reason for it," she said, "I move at the end of the month and work there ends at the end of July. Then I'll come back here and everything will continue normally."
"My manager wants me to work there for four months, then I'll come back to my normal job. That's it" She even touched my thigh her hand "Don't worry too much, my family will visit there and I'll visit here. It's just a two-hour flight and a short ride."
I was very relieved. Nevertheless, they are like my family and I want that my close people to have the best possible life.
"The biggest change is that you won't see me as often as now," she said. "Because my family is important, I'm with them when I'm here. It is a priority now. , like other members of the Committee, I see you every day as online surveillance cameras so the thing doesn't change.
Only the physical meeting will be reduced."
I think that Ilona is quite rare anyway been involved in meetings and sessions. In many cases, there are only two male members in the O-sessions.
Ilona thinking, "It may be good that I take a little distance from you and your daily life. You've come too close to me. It's not your fault, I allowed it to happen and it's not a good thing. "She thought. "We have to remember our position and status ... you're a prisoner and I'm one who controls you. It is not good that I would be too friendly feelings for you. It messes things".
She looked at me again "and you have a friend in the Committee, she always defend you as a lion mother ".
I had noticed a change in Ilona, she was usually very hard and determined in my relation, now I had noticed the softness in her behavior.
She is also right about another woman in the committee.  I know that she defends me and will do everything so that I have be all right. But we have a particularly strong bond that I can always rely on.
It would also be nice if Ilona was my friend ... on the other hand, I also understand that it is impossible.

"20 km" said the man again.

to be continued...

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Ilona took the electric shock controller and switched on the  channel two. My crotch area woke up. I felt subdued itching, she added power and I felt it better now. She looked at my reaction and then added more strength.
She added vaginal vibration again, it started to feel wild.
The intensity of electric shocks in my buttocks was also added. I felt like I was moving up and down in the seat even though I knew it was impossible because of tight belts.
I was tightly seated and I felt uncomfortable. I felt like I was getting sexually aroused.
I desperately wanted to move!
"Can you take the belt off from around my arms, I feel very uncomfortable and I would like to move my arms a little," I I begged "It's so tight that it's hard for me to breathe! "
"You know that I will not take it away," Ilona said and looked at me with interest, "and I'm already loosen your thigh belt".
Ilona looked at me. She took two different gags out of her bag.
"We're driving on motorway now, no one bothering us. I give you the opportunity to choose" She showed me the gags.
One was my ordinary ball gag and the other was a gag with perhaps a bigger ball, the ball continued like a penis and went deeper into the throat.
It was familiar to me, I hated it. It filled my mouth badly and irritated my throat, it did not trigger the gag reflex but was always close to it. And it caused uncontrolled drooling.
"If you choose penisgag, I'll adjust your upper body belt looser. Otherwise, you will use your normal gag and belt will not be adjusted" she looked at me "It's your decision."

She was cruel! Normal ball gag doesn't give me problems. I'm very accustomed to using it.
But I wanted that belt would be more loose, it was now very uncomfortable, especially when electric shocks increased.
"Penisgag is very uncomfortable" I appeal "it causes a lot of spit and I feel like I'm vomiting! I mess up myself!"
"Gag teaches you to focus and control yourself" Ilona said patiently, "and you will not mess with yourself if you swallow your saliva."
"You have to adjust the belt looser," I said with determination. I felt like I couldn't stand it anymore. I knew it was impossible to swallow all the saliva, I'd mess with myself but I didn't care anymore. I wanted the belt out!
Ilona raised the penis gag close to my mouth. "How long? I asked quickly" How long should I keep it? "
"Not a long time" she said and put the gag on my lips.
I opened my mouth and she pushed gag gently into my mouth, she gave my throat to get used to the new intruder. She took it back so I had time to get used to. I got a gag reflex but I didn't vomit out. It was very unpleasant. also humiliating.
Gag pushed my tongue down, eventually staying inside my mouth completely. Ilona tied the strap behind my neck. She brutally tightened it so that the gag penetrated even deeper into my mouth.
I knew what it was like but still I got a panic attack. I couldn't swallow anything. I felt like I couldn't breathe!
Ilona had a hand towel and she patiently cleaned my mouth and chin.
"Calm now" she said calmly, "you know what this is going to do. When you focus, you can breathe through your nose quite well" She looked at me decisively, "You have to calm down, then I can adjust the belt looser, not before!"

It was very difficult for me to curb myself, I felt like she was cheating on me! She promised to adjust the belt if I take the penisgag ... now she says she can't do it before I calm down!
I was trying to curb my panic and irritation.
Because of the belt, I can't breathe and the gag prevents me from breathing also ... I should calm myself and focus on breathing through the nose but it felt overwhelming.
Basically, I have experience with this in the past. A similar situation. Then I lost my consciousness, and when I came to my mind, I breathed "normally".  I was relaxed and I could breathe well through my nose. Even then, the gag was not taken out of my mouth.
So I tried to relax, it was difficult but I knew I had no other option.
I finally managed to do that, sometimes it seemed that I lost my consciousness but it didn't happen, at least I didn't notice it.
I could breathe through the nose. I looked at the joy and tried to say something but it didn't work. Only vague sound came from somewhere.
Ilona wiped my face and chin, she smiled at me "You went far before you relaxed, it could have been easier":
I noticed now that the torso belt was looser now. Maybe I was a moment unconscious.
The looser belt did not really affect anything. I was still tight in the seat. But I was able to breathe slightly better.

"20 km" driver said.

"OK, are you ready for the first leg culmination" Ilona asked.

to be continued...

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When I was able to think again, I noticed that I didn't have a gag in my mouth anymore. Also the belts of the upper body and thighs were loosened.
No vibration or electrical impulses. I didn't feel buttplug though I knew it was still there.
I was exhausted and tired but also relaxed.
"You're really something ..." Ilona said and looked at me.
She lifted a bottle of water on my lips so I could drink. My mouth was very dry now ... maybe all my saliva had run out. My throat felt sore.
"You're getting used to the rougher and harder Orgasm sessions, where does the limit go? "she asked," Do you always need something new and harder to achieve the goal? "
I'm thinking, "It's not going to be so, every time it's different. It is also affected by emotion and other circumstances. Even if things do the same, I can feel everything different. This journey has been very important to me mentally. Yesterday's surprising start to the journey, a long and difficult trip here ... sauna and cold snow. I reached in the first orgasm already yesterday."
"Grandma's meeting was tough but at the same time it gave me a chance to let go of the thoughts. I am grateful to you." I continued "Then my alleged violence and the ensuing happens and humiliation, it was all well planned and made me forget my grief" I smiled tiredly "You surprised me."
Ilona looked at me seriously, "Maybe something had been planned in advance but still charge you the violence is still valid. We not planned it".

I didn't fully believe what she said. The happens and allegation of my attempts to do something violent were completely ridiculous. They need to understand it!
"That's the thing that needs to be dealt with thoroughly," she said, "because we can't arrange the committee meeting right away, you have to wait for it. Until then, you will remain under special surveillance and your restraints and control practices will also be added. We'll give the guards more instructions about it . At the same time we will return to the old behavior an the rules. They've been away for a long time, maybe it's the cause of your disobedience. You clearly need a discipline and a clear line of practice! "
I was very surprised and disappointed at the same time. Returning to the old rules makes my life much more difficult again.
I thought bitterly that now my guards are happy. They are empowered to make my life more difficult.
On the other hand, I thought it was only temporary, the Committee understands that this is a misunderstanding.
But now I have to endure the changes so things don't get worse ... If I do not manage myself now, it can affect the long time of my life.
"But why ..." I started but Ilona quickly interrupted me.
"What I just said ..." she said seriously "Your behavioral rules are valid from this moment, it also applies to speech and respect for others!"
I knew what that meant. I have to ask for permission if I want to say something, I always have to answer questions. I can't talk to them like before. That is, in my opinion, a foolish subjugation. But in a way I also understand the importance of discipline.
My tears came to my cheeks. The change came as suddenly, I couldn't wait for it even though she had already mentioned it before.
I liked the fact that she was kind to me, now she again changes everything.
I no longer had a good and relaxed feeling. I hated that I was tightly seated in the car seat. I hated that my legs were locked in the car floor. I didn't like my hands being locked firmly on my waist and I sat tightly on the 4-point harness.
And before all, I hated my rubber pants. they were very distressing, they felt cold but still my feet were sweaty ... and I think my diaper was wet.

to be continued...

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"There are also other issues in this regard need to think again," the driver said "For example, outdoor activities and its practices. It has many steps that can be made more secure."
Ilona switches the power on an egg in my vagina, vibration was quite hard at the beginning.
"Maybe we can make use of the cages that have been made for you," the man continued "Now they are not used, it would be good to use them".
"Good idea!" Ilona said in excitement, "Your contract are a few rights that we are committed to follow. For example, everyday outdoor activities, health and good food, the opportunity to work, clothing, etc ... they are the basics. But we can still tighten practices, outdoor cage is a good idea! "
She continued to think "If you are locked in a cage inside a building before leaving. There are wheels underneath the cage so you can be pushed out into the yard for an hour. You are always in maximum security and the work of the guard becomes easier.
Sounds like a good idea!"
"Cages can be used at the same time," the man said " prisoner is properly locked in a small Pichard cage and it's all inside a bigger cage. Then it's pushed out."
"In the yard, on the wall of the house,  can be installed the locking points so that the cage can be locked into the wall. Perhaps even more so that cages cannot be opened outside building in any case" he continued.

Inside car was quiet again, only the radio sound.
I thought ... All those plans seemed awful.
It would mean I couldn't walk outside, not even sitting on the bench. I would be forced on my knees inside a small cage.
If Pichard Cage had been in use, my hands and elbows would be sorely behind me and I would be tightly folded on my knees. It would be a very bad hour.
I was terrified of this plan but I was also surprised because I noticed that it somehow also aroused me.

Ilona switched the electric impulses on my buttocks, the same familiar pulse rhythm started pumping my buttocks again.
In my opinion, it was not enough time to go, but maybe I was wrong, it was hard for me to think sensibly.

to be continued...

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The journey continued steadily. I tried to concentrate but it was difficult.
My thoughts about the future were cruising in my head. Thoughts were vague because I was also sexually aroused.
It was a very unreal situation.
I tried to think about what I am ... I'm a weird freak who enjoys sexual discomfort and irritation. At the same time, I also hate everything.
The saliva spilled from my mouth, it came to my jaw and dropped on my shirt, above the breast. I felt the shirt was wet. It disgusted me.
Ilona pumped more air into my buttplug, it expanded clearly, at the same time feeling of vagina egg vibration  increased.
I felt how my excitement grew all the time.
Ilona tightened the belt on my upper body, then on the thighs. I was completely stuck again and very close to orgasm.
I could see she took her scarf again. I was panicked and I thought that I do not need that I headscarf now, I'm calm, my head does not need to tie a scarf!
I tried to tell it to him but he didn't want to understand.
Finally, the scarf was tightly around my head and headrest, I felt my nose flattened under  already wet scarf.
I was trying to be calm but I was also very excited.
Eventually, I let the orgasm come. It came again in the waves. It wasn't as explosive as the first time, but still very strong.
I got an orgasm, I hoped the session would end but it didn't happen. She increased the vibrator's power and made me crazy again! I think she also made the power of electric shock stronger.
I was completely under her control and finally everything was dark again.
When I got back again I noticed that the scarf was gone. Gag was still in my mouth, it was uncomfortable but I had learned to accept it. I knew I could breathe.
Belts were still tight around me.

Ilona looked at me "OK, you're back here" she said "we have to buy fuel for the car. We go to the gas station, it's an automated station and we hope there's no other cars there.This car has lightly shaded glasses but you have to behave well. If someone outside looks at you, everything must look normal. Do you understand?"
I was very tired ... I nodded while I was wondering how I can look normal if I have a tight gag in my mouth?
My thought was useless because she took the gag out of my mouth. She used a scarf and wiped my face.
"Outside is already dim so I'm not worried" she said "but you have to be careful now!"
We arrived at the gas station, the automatic pump had no other cars.
The driver got out of the car and made a credit card payment. He came next to the car, took a gaspistol and started refueling.
A car came to our side. There was a family in the car, the mother sat in the front seat and the kids in the back seat. The man got out of the car and went to pay.
Ilona put the scarf on my hands so that the handcuffs can't be noticed.
"Don't look out" she ordered "look at me all the time, I want to see your eyes!"
I did, I understood why I had to do that. I could have the opportunity to attract attention but now it was impossible. I followed the commandments.
They were so close that I could hear the children's conversation!
It felt humiliating and tears came from my eyes, I continued to look at her.
The driver got refueled, he say a few words with another tanker and sat in the car.
"Eyes towards me all the time..." Ilona reminded me.
The driver started the car and drove off the refueling area.He sighed deeply and said, "It was quite exciting! I think I need a cigarette now".
"Not yet," Ilona said, "Now we will continue our journey normally and maybe we will stop at the next gas station, etc. Everything must look normal."

to be continued...

A new month, the beginning of June now.

I have had some difficulty maintaining the forum and diary.
Some of you know that I was accused of bad, even violent behavior.
It led to changes in my daytime routine and many other practices. That also limited my web activity.

Now (finally) the Committee has dealt with this issue and made a decision.
The Committee concluded that I had done nothing wrong, the whole thing was a misunderstanding that grew too big.

The waiting time for the solution has been very long, difficult and hard.

My prisoner's status rose to a new level. It wasn't "Max Security" as usual, it was "High Level Max Security".

It's very hard because I knew that I did not deserve it.

I was informed about the decision yesterday but the security level hasn't been lowered yet. I'm waiting for it.

I love to get back to my normal life and rhythm again.
High Level Max Security crushes human mind and health, I do not recommend it to anyone.

I missed many things because of that, but I hope I will get all the things back to work.

Thank you to everyone who contacted me during this terrible time.

I love you!

Miisa, prisoner

After a long break I can continue to write my travel report.

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We continued our journey. The family at the gas station apparently hadn't noticed anything unusual.
I still understood the driver's reaction and tension, he really needed a cigarette break.

The car stopped at the next resting place and the driver got out of the car. He walked around the car with a cigarette in his hand.
I was tired. I was very satisfied with sex but it was very hard physically.

"You know John / Joanna Green?" Ilona suddenly asked me, "What kind of relationship do you have with him?"

JG-Leathers is a highly respected person in the fetish and bdsm world. I appreciate his life's work which is very large.

"Ma'am, we have no actual relationship," I said, "I know his writings and art, I admire them".
"Have you been in contact with him?" she asked.
"We've been discussing sometime long ago" I said "it was before I moved to my new place. You and the Committee know it. I understant that he also talked with the Committee".
I remembered that, JG-leathers had made a big impression on me. I felt he knew my thoughts. He also appreciated my life and did not question it in any way.
He travels around the world and he wanted to come to visit me too.
I was very excited about meeting him.
He talked to the Committee, I don't know exactly what happened.
Eventually I moved to a new location and my Max Security rules came into use.
Maybe because of this the visit never came, He didn't contact me anymore and I didn't dare to do it.
I don't know what happened between the Committee and him. Perhaps the Committee did not want us to be in touch.
It's sad, I liked him.

The driver sat in the car again and the journey continued.
Ilona told the driver about the topic of the discussion.
"You know his writings, what do you think of them?" Ilona asked me.

I'm thinking about that.
"I like several of his books, I can identify with the character of the books" I'm thinking "But the stories progress so that they become impossible. No one can live in such a controlled life as the main characters. That would be impossible."
"But there are a lot of the same elements in your life," the driver said. "You have contacts with normal life and the ordinary world but still your living environment is very similar to what JG-Leathers says in books."
I was wondering, he was right. I had never thought about it so closely.
At the same time, I was struck by a strange idea ... whether he, JG-Leathers; somehow involved in my life?
I thought more, I compared my life to his writings.
I found a lot of similarities, I had just considered them as stories and I could not combine them into my life.

Is he part of the Committee? Is he an advisor / expert to the committee? If so, does he see my surveillance cameras every moment? Who else can look at them?
Thousands of thoughts collided in my head, I was too tired now...

The idea that he would follow my life did not shock me, actually that thought seemed good and safe. As I said before, I liked him.

"Ma'am, sir ... I am now very confused," I said, "what am I supposed to think? Tell me, if he's involved in my life?"
Ilona did not reply, she focused on her mobile phone, she sent and received messages.
"Perhaps the thing is that we too have read those same stories" driver laughed "maybe we just have used some ready-made ideas for you".

Ilona looked at me, "I have now been in contact with the guards and some other peoples , they will make some changes and additions to your living environment even now. Everything is not enough time to get ready, the next few days made more".
I was shocked, I didn't understand why the changes were made. I cried and tried to ask it.
"You have to understand that we have to be extra careful" Ilona said "when there is a suspicion of dangerous / violent behavior, etc. we have to react".
"The blacksmith is now doing some things right now, we also have new things to make sure you sleep safely, for example, you get a new hood that is much more restrictive than the current ones. You have to remember that our purpose is not to hurt you. When you adapt to new restrictions, you will notice that everything is for your safety".

I didn't understand what this all meant.
Will my life be more like JG-Leather stories? Why did they talk about it now?
At the same time I felt how the vibrator in my vagina came alive again.
I was tired and I might not have wanted a new Orgasm session but at the same time I was excited about what I had heard.
I was ready for a new session ...

to be continued...

A brief update

Some of peoples have asked if I'm okay.

Everything is basically alright even though I can say this has been a very unpleasant time.

Here is something big changes, I have a lot of new constraints.
This has been sort of a "retraining" and a reminder of who I really am ... my role and status.

I think that this takes time maybe the end of July. After that, I hope my normal routines return.

This thing first made me angry and sad, but as always, I got used to it.
Now I have a dream that everything will be back to normal.

During this time my restraints have been added a lot.
My clothes are uncomfortable and bad material.
Hygiene is reduced and even the food is different.
I can do my work online but I can't, for example, listen to music or watch movies.
Outdoor time is very strict, controlled and limited, it's like torture. My night time also.
My guard often said that I live like a princess... I'm definitely not a princess anymore.
Even Hannibal Lechter did not live in such strict supervision and prison.

When this is over, I learned my lesson and I live again in my normal life.

a continuation of the previous writing
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I kept my eyes closed, I was trying to sleep, or at least I tried seems to be sleeping.
I knew the terrifying topic of discussion was only theoretical, but it still excited me. Get excited scared me because it was abnormal, sick even to me.
Still, I thinking of different scenarios in my mind. I thought through things in great detail.

If there was a case for me to be amputated, I'd wish it was my legs. The movement of my feet is already limited so it would not be such a bad option.
Of course, it would be possible to remove one leg, but for some reason I think of both legs.

I still tried to think clearly.
An important factor would also be how high the amputation is made.

Even ankle / lower leg amputation prevents walking normally. In the case of only one foot, in a special case the prosthesis will "normalize" the situation. Then, by removing the prosthesis, the prisoner is effectively restricted. This would slow down the prisoner and make her easily manageable.
It would eliminate the use of leg restraints? I think not ... restraints / chain still needed in order to be sure that the prisoner is secured.

I thought to myself in this option. I could have an easy-to-use prosthesis for short transition walks. At the final site (eg my desk, bed) the prosthesis is removed, making my movement difficult. Still, one foot needs a legcuff that can be locked in a convenient place.

If both legs had lower amputation, the use of anklecuffs would be impossible.
Then it would be perhaps the shackles of the thighs ... it would require perhaps waistbelt which descend vertical chains down to the thighs, they would thigh bands at the correct height.
Between the thighs would be a short chain that would prevent their movement.
Of course, this type of shackle can be used anyway. It is also easy to hide under the skirt.
If both legs are  amputated, it is good if the prisoner is fastened to the chair during work. For example, This can be used waistbelt lock.
It's safety for the prisoner.
In this case, the prisoner's hands may be free to work, etc. Of course handcuffs and chains are used when needed, for example when moving from one place to another.
If the amputation is made higher, above the knee or even higher, I would think that a wheelchair is the best option.
The prisoner can then be locked in a wheelchair using belts or steel straps.
When the chair is in the correct position, the wheels can be locked so that the prisoner cannot use them or the chair can be locked to the floor.
With this mindset, I would be able to continue my daily work as a prisoner.

In my opinion, the far more terrifying idea is that my hands are gone.
Then I wouldn't be able to work. I can still imagine having all my lower restraints, corset, collar and my backchain.
I could stand, sit, walk for a little while ... but I couldn't do anything sensible because I wouldn't have hands ...
Actually, it's such a scary thing that I don't want to think about it.

But there's a worse scenario ... all the limbs amputated.

A prisoner would be like a vegetable ... locked in a bed or chair, inside a cell or cage.
She could do nothing but wait for  to be cared for and time to run out. That would be the maximum life sentence.

I am happy that all this is only a theoretical fantasy.
Now, at least I know all my limbs because of the long travel time that tortures them.

to be continued...

a continuation of the previous writing
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We arrived at the gate, it opened electronically as always.
I saw the guards standing in the yard waiting for us.
They looked like an ordinary couple standing on the yard of a house.

The outsider cannot foresee what is going on inside the house.
Car lights illuminated the yard, and there were other lights. The snow had almost thawed and the yard was wet and watery.
The house still looked like a beautiful, white brick, low building with a large garage and additional wing.
I liked the house already when I visited there for the first time. At that time I didn't know it was going to be my prison. Back then, there was no fence or electric gate around the yard.
The garage door was open, we drove straight in.
The guards followed and closed the doors.

The garage is well lit, inside there is a door from which we can enter directly into the house.
There is also another door, it looks stronger than the other. It's a steel door to my prison. In fact, it has double doors with access to the prison  lounge room.

The prison door looks very strong and has a built-in lock, but it also has an external lock latch and strong locks on display.
It's a very impressive door that matters a lot to me.
The female guard opens the prison door, while at the same time Ilona removes my extra belts from the car seat. The male guard unlock my leg irons vehicle floor.
Guards help me out of the car. They quickly grab hold of my arms and escort me in my prison lobby.
The female guard is a little shorter than the male but they are very strong, they also know the right technique. All I can do is obey.

They lead me to the lobby table. The woman removes my cuffs from the waist chain, she quickly locks them to the locking point on the table. They let go of my arms and move to my side.
The guard plans to move the chair behind me, but Ilona stops him.
"The prisoner doesn't need a chair now," Ilona said, "She's been sitting for a long time, now is a good time to stand."
My posture is not good, the table is too low and the anchor point so far away that I have to lean over the table.
Ilona looks at me, "the legcuffs need to be locked to the floor."
Guard uses a padlock and locks my hobblechain to the floor anchorage.
I have a very uncomfortable position, Ilona and others look at me with interest. It adds to my discomfort, it is also humiliating.
"Good," Ilona said, "The prisoner can wait here while we go inside the house to discuss practical issues".
Ilona smiled at me "As the prisoner can see, all the toys in the car trip are still on" she paused, I tried to look and saw that all the wires and airtube went in my coat pockets.
"... so we're putting equipment to work so that the prisoner's time is not too long, it's entertainment for you" Ilona looked at me
"and it may be a long time before you have the opportunity to do it next time ..."
She came and patiently pumped air into my buttplug, after that she launched a vagina egg and finally I felt the electric shocks start.

This time there was no warm-up, she adjusted everything to max power. I had a lot of trouble staying up, I wanted to move my legs but legcuff prevented it.
I was lying on the table but it was hard, my wrists were tightly chained, I still had mittens in my hands, I felt my anxious corset.
All my parts were like fire! They can't leave me here!

But I heard the door close ...

to be continued...