1

Jonas watched TV in an open hallway, like almost every day.
There was normal traffic in the hallway. The men were walking in loose gollege clothes, no one was in a hurry.
The clothes all had similar gray, dark purple additions. The letters from the prison department were clearly displayed on the clothes.
The department was calm, so had been for a long time. Actually, there was a disturbance only when a new prisoner came in who imagined himself too much. A hard face who had watched too many tough criminal and prison movies.
The reality was not like that.
Jonas also had a television in his cell, as well as a radio player, coffee maker and everything else needed.
Cell doors were open during the day but he wanted to be in the hallway, to see people, other prisoners.
He liked that the nights were behind a locked door. There was no problem with that. Peace was always guaranteed.
He had been here for a long time, he seemed to belong to the fleet.
There were some guards who had also been here for a long time, they were friendly people to get along with.
Actually the same thing was about the guards, sometimes new guys came in and they thought they were something special. Unfortunately, sadists and narcissists sometimes get through education.

An old familiar guard came and stopped next to Jonas.
"Today is your lucky day again" the guard smiled "You can meet Laura again! I would be happy too if I had bilateral meetings with her ... "
Jonas also enjoyed meeting Laura again. They had had many meetings, the intervals between meetings were getting shorter all the time. He should be happy.
Laura is a prison psychologist, she is a person who sees good in all people. Her work hasn’t made her a cynic, yet.
They walked to the end of the hallway, the Guard opened the door, then another. They moved to the elevator that took us to the third floor.
They walked along new hallway again, there were many office doors in the hallway until we were on the right door.
The guard knocked on the door and after a while the door opened.
Laura smiled at them  and showed Jonas with her hand that he could step inside.
The room was as always before. Office table and chair, round table in front of the window and three armchairs.
Jonas sat in a chair where he always sit.
The guard nodded to Laura and closed the door from outside.
Jonas sat in a chair as he often did before. He looked at the room. There were some flowers on the table, there was some little tree in the pot in the corner.
Next to the door was a coat hanger with Laura’s black long leather jacket and scarf.
Jonas thought I had never seen a coat on Laura. He would like to see it.
He looked at Laura. She was in good shape, even a beautiful woman who glowed with confidence. Laura had once said, by accident, that she is a passionate Tango dancer. It was very easy for Jonas to believe it.
She wore a polo shirt and a blue skirt, knee-length. Jonas smiled when he realized it was close to a police officer's clothing color. It suited her well.
She had comfortable and soft interior shoes on her feet, Jonas was a little disappointed. He looked at the table next to her on the floor and saw her boots.
He sighed deeply. This was all I could get, He had to accept it.
Sometime a long time ago, Laura wore leather pants when they met. It was too much for Jonas. He told her he can’t concentrate if she wears that way, the meeting can’t continue like that.
She understood the matter and Jonas haven’t seen her dressed in leather since.
But he remember and think about it every night.
Laura sat across from Jonas and looked at he.
She asked how his days have passed and change  normal compliments.
Jonas can’t ask how her day has gone. He would like to ask but that is not a good thing.
He  thinking about her a lot, trying to infer things in her.
She doesn't have a ring, Jonas don't know if she has a man, a family, kids ... It would interest  but he can't ask.
Jonas couldn’t even know her last name or that where she lived. He didn’t even know if Laura was her real name.
Anyway, Laura was the only woman he had talked to for many years so it could well say that Laura is the most important woman in Jonas life.
Of course, there are other women at work in the prison, such as the kitchen, cleaning and a few guards. But they were not important.
You might have been able to flirt with them but not really talk.

"You were out here for two days last week," Laura began, "How did it feel?"
"It was horrible," Jonas said, "I couldn't do anything. I went straight from here by taxi to the hostel where you had booked a room for me."
Laura looked at Jonas questioningly and he continued.
"The whole world has changed, I couldn't do anything. I had € 50 in my pocket. The only thing I did was go to a nearby store to buy water and potato chips. Then I sat in the room and watched TV. After the night I waited to call a taxi to get me back here. It cost all my money. "
"You'll be released from prison soon" Laura said patiently, "You were out of jail because you got used to the normal world. You have to try better!"
Laura looked at Jonas, Jonas saw sympathy in her eyes. He hated himself and was very anxious. He just wanted to be inside his cell.
"You're 42 now." Laura looked at her papers. "You've been a prisoner for over 22 years. That's more than half of your life. It's very natural that you're confused and even scared."
"I know you're not a bad person," she continued, "You still have a long and good life ahead of you but you have to dare to trust it and step out!"
"How do you know that I am a good person," Jonas said, "I am killed three people."
"We have talked about this many times," Laura said, "I've read your papers and legal documents. I know you're a prisoner history."
"I think you have experienced a lot of injustice," she continued, "you only had to defend yourself at the age of 19 and two young people who attacked you died. It was a great tragedy. The biggest tragedy is that you were sentenced to 16 years in prison!"
Jonas knew all that, really knew, but he let Laura continue.
"You got free after 8 years because you were a first time, you were almost a year free and you adapted to society again "Laura told Jonas' history.
"...You got into trouble again because some persons wanted revenge for your previous actions, they thought you got freedom too soon," Laura said. "They attacked you and again someone died. It's sad. Your sentence was 14 years but now you've served it. You can still adapt to freedom and society ".
"That's all true "Jonas said quietly" Every time I defend myself something nasty happens. Maybe I shouldn’t be free! ”
"Nonsense" Laura said vigorously, "We will arrange for you a new opportunity to visit the outside world. You will only have a few weeks to complete freedom. Before that, I will arrange a meeting for you at the employment agency, social services, etc. We organize for you also permanent home! "
"I already have a home," Jonas said, "it's been 22 years!"
"Why are you so good and encouraging to me?" Jonas asked.
"I already told you, you're not a bad person" Laura smiled "I want to believe in you!"
"If you were a rapist, a pedophile, or some narcissistic real criminal I wouldn't help you," Laura said seriously.
“It’s your profession here,” Jonas said.
"Not everyone can help," she said, "I hope I can help you."
"An old proverb says: A sailor can be helped in a distress at sea, but the sailor must row himself!"

3

Jonas felt anxious.
He was still lying on the bed and remembering things like he does every night.
When he was convicted, he feared prison and what would happen to him there.
The fear proved futile. Some old and experienced prisoners took him under protection, they helped him adjust.
All the prisoners knew his story and even felt a little pity for him.
On the other hand, everyone respected him because he had defended himself against the attackers to the end. They considered him a fighter.
His first sentence was 16 years. It was more than almost all inmates. The crimes of others were thefts, assaults, drug offenses, etc., of course, there were also killers and murderers.
Jonas was a first-timer, so it is possible to be released after half serving his sentence. It requires good behavior and a desire to study, to continue life.
Jonas did so, the other prisoners encouraged him because they saw that he was only a young boy.
He worked as a carpenter in a prison workshop, studying at the same time and getting a kind of degree. He liked being able to create things with his hands.
His cellmate was a long-time prisoner named Markus. Markus was a thinker, he had practiced oriental martial arts as well as mind control for a long time.
Markus taught Jonas a lot of things. He learned controlled series of movements that required strict concentration and thus purification of the mind. The world seemed to slow down and even stop as they did the exercises.
Prison rules forbade physical match but no exercise, it was comparable to yoga, for example.
They practiced in the prison gym but also inside the cell. It was like slow motion ballet, well focused and controlled.
Mark taught him self-defense, he said a wise man never has to attack.
The most important lesson was to learn to take advantage of the attacker's strength and energy.
An angry attacker in particular often makes mistakes that are easy to exploit. That is why mind control is very important.
Jonas learned that when you focus well and reach the right state of mind, time slows down giving yourself significantly more time to act than the attacker.
They were great doctrines that could be utilized in ordinary life as well, not just in combat or self-defense.
It’s an oriental way of approaching life and Jonas wanted to develop it more and more, and there was time for it in prison.

Time passed and the time came when Jonas was released from prison.
He said goodbye to all his friends in prison and enthusiastically entered a new life.
He got an apartment and even a job from a carpenter’s workshop. He settled back in his hometown. He adapted surprisingly easily to normal life even though he was timid in social contacts.
In a small town, many knew his history. He was like a public figure, people stopped and turned to look at him .. or that was what Jonas felt like many times.
At first he always had evenings at home, he followed routines he had learned in prison.
But he was still a young man, he wanted to see life, meet people.
He sometimes visited a nearby bar in the evenings. He watched people and even drank beer sometimes. Everything went well and he even made new friends.
At the bar, he met a woman who sometimes visited Jonas. Life was nice. He liked the woman and wanted to tell her what had happened in the past. The woman had been understanding. She said she knew everything already. She said everything was fine.
One evening, weekend, they went to the familiar  bar and sat down. The evening was nice and it turned into a night. Jonas was never so late outside, especially at the bar.
The woman was clearly nervous and Jonas didn't understand why. He wanted to leave the bar but the woman still wanted to stay.
Three men entered the bar, they clearly identified Jonas. They bought a beer and came to sit at the next table, one of them sitting in the chair of Jonas' table.
Jonas knew right away that something bad was going on.
"So the information was right," the man told Jonas, "The killer has come out of hiding."
Jonas was confused, on the other hand he had known this was going to happen but still he had rejected that idea.
"Everything is fine," the woman said to Jonas, "They just want to understand what happened when two of our friends died."
Jonas couldn't believe what he was hearing. The woman had led him here trapped!
"You told them where they would find me?" Jonas asked in disbelief.
"I told them that but you don't have to be afraid. They just want to talk to you," she said.
The three men sat near Jonas and looked at him hostilely.
"Do you know that the man you killed first has a boy?" the man sitting next to him asked quietly.
"There is no child," Jonas said in disbelief, "I would have been told it in court."
"The son was born only half a year after what happened, without the father," the man said, "Because of you."
Jonas didn't know what to say.
"We are reasonable," the man said, "If we calculate that child support costs a thousand euros a month, you now owe about 100,000 Euros. In addition, you have to pay maintenance until he is an adult.
ie a total of approximately € 250 000 with interest. How are you going to handle it? ”
"You know that it is impossible," Jonas said quietly, "I'm sorry if indeed it is true that the child is there but I am not responsible for him!"
"We have a suggestion for you," the man said
"You have to do services and work for us so you can pay off your debt."
The men came closer and closer to Jonas, the situation was very explosive.
Jonas thought about how he could get out of the situation.
He suddenly quickly jumped to his feet. The man sitting next to him was startled and fell with his chair. All bar customers were staring at them.
Jonas quickly attacked the door, he wanted to get out, running away from home, behind doors and locks.
He got out, on the sidewalk when man caught him, he wasn’t fast enough.
The man grabbed his jacket, Jonas tried to get him off of him and pushed him away from his chest like an American football player, the attacker staggered back and fell to the ground.
The man stood up, very angry. He prepared to attack towards Jonas. Jonas saw that he is not very experienced fighter. The man decided to try a high kick. Jonas saw it well in advance, the man was not very fast.
As his foot rose, Jonas dodged and lifted the kicker's foot further up with his left hand. At the same time, he kicked the attacker's support leg so that it failed.
The end result was that the force of the attacker's own movement threw him into the air so that he landed on the ground with the back of his head above.
Jonas heard the attacker's head hit the hard asphalt.
The man was no longer moving.

to be continued...